changes

Dear hearts,

Things are changing quickly these days. Val’s symptoms have begun worsening much more rapidly. As of the last couple days she can no longer get out of bed. She fights constantly for oxygen. The medicines for pain, nausea, anxiety and breathing leave her groggy and often cause hallucinations.

Tonight Val  made the decision to move to the in-patient hospice facility. We expect to make that move this week, depending on when there is an opening.

Val’s sisters were here last week, and her dad comes tomorrow. There has been time for all of us to say the things that need saying, over and over again. And then time to sit with our hands in the dog’s fur, making quiet jokes, watching the rainbows from the window crystals dapple across the walls. Ample time. It isn’t as much time as I want. But it has been richly filled.

Please continue to hold us in your hearts.

Love,

Deborah

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12 thoughts on “changes

  1. Ample time, richly filled. The struggle for breath. The decision to go. Hands in dog’s fur. Not enough. Enough. My heart is full with you, beating between a heavy, heavy place and one filled with light. My love to you all, and my wishes for peace. Holly

  2. I saw with my mother that being in an inpatient hospice can bring this continuous easing of pain and panic that you can’t achieve at home — and a sense for everyone involved that you’re relaxing into the right space. They know what all of you need, even before you do. Then your only task, as Val said, is to let go and be together. I’m holding you in my heart, sending prayers for whatever healing is needed and for the most peaceful journey. May this time be filled up with blessings.
    Rita.

  3. Dear Deborah & Val, you are both in my heart. Val, even while facing death you have embraced life. Kim and I are thinking of you both with love.
    Gwen

  4. Thank you, Deborah. For everything. My heart is with Val, and all of her support. You are all such wonderful spirits.

  5. Peace be with you both and all those around you. Love, love, Love and hugs, pat

  6. Thank you so much for the update. I am carrying both of you so close to my heart through these days. So much love your way.

  7. Read this morning in The Tao of Pooh:

    Courage follows caring.

    May both continue to be felt in abundance.

  8. Val, Thank you for the gift of you. Your friendship has enriched my life. I pray your journey to the other side is peaceful. My mom walked over that bridge full of wonder about what she was going to encounter. It seemed to serve her well.

    Love

    Sara

    Sara

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